It’s hard to get away from social media these days. It’s the new form of communication between people. And where there’s communication, there’s chances for romance. But you need to know how to pick up women on social media without being creepy, and I’m going to tell you.

Social media might not be the first online place you think of to pick up girls. There are after all an abundance of online dating websites and apps to use. However sites like Twitter, Facebook and Instagram can almost be compared to bars and coffeeshops. It’s not made for dating, but you can definitely flirt with someone there.

I will be focusing mainly on how to approach a girl romantically via Twitter, Facebook and Instagram. However a lot of advice translates to most social media platforms.


When it comes to Twitter, there’s a few good points to consider. First of all, you can follow your crushes’s tweets, like them and engage them in conversation. This is a good way for them to get you on their radar.

However you should also remember that replying to the publicly means everyone can see those tweets. This goes with commenting on any public social media post. That means you should consider not flirting, but simply having a conversation. Think of it like PDA, if you wouldn’t want to read other people flirting on the thread, don’t do it yourself.

Once you’ve gotten their attention, work on building up a connection. Then you can move things to direct messaging (or “slide into their DMs”) and be more flirty there. Remember to be relaxed about it though. They might like you as a person up to this point, but don’t know if you have romantic interests. So try not to come on too strong.


You need a completely different approach when it comes to facebook. Facebook is great for finding out background information. This makes things a little easier, because you can find out about common interests etc. However unlike Twitter, it’s not open to the public for conversations, so you’ll have to add her as a friend first.

How do you add a stranger as a friend? Well, firstly, I don’t recommend it. I very rarely accept friend requests from people I have never met, or who don’t have friends in common with me. So first, pick girls who you might actually have friends in common with!

When facebook researching, try not to like posts or photos from years ago. It flags you as someone who’s going through all her posts. Of course, if you want her to know you have an interest in her, this could work as a subtle way of showing that. Don’t like too many of her posts and photos in one go. It’s a  rookie mistake. You can appreciate without having to notify her of it.

It can be good to comment on a very recent post she has made. But with facebook, once you are already friends it’s best to open up a private message. Say something like “Oh I saw you posted about x, I have an interested in that as well! What did you think of…” This way you’re starting a conversation.

Don’t go in with a message telling her how beautiful she is, or how you want to meet up for coffee. There’s a distance in online social media than in person, so you have to build the connection with normal conversations first.


I personally think Instagram is the hardest social media platform to pick women up on, but I’ve been told it’s in fact the easiest. There’s no rule against liking as many posts by your crush as you want. Commenting is also a free-for-all, although the chances of getting  a response is lower.

You can also send direct messages via Instagram. From there, like Facebook, you can start up a conversation. Instagram gives you more leeway on giving compliments. It’s fine to tell a girl she’s beautiful straight away, and that you think her photos are super hot. Out of all the social media platforms, Instagram is the most shallow.

That doesn’t mean the people on there are shallow, it’s just the mentality is a little bit more open. Unlike Facebook and Twitter, Instagram promotes itself as a place for sharing purely photos.


There are some things that you shouldn’t do, no matter which social media platform you’re on.

  • Don’t send dick pics without permission
  • If she says she’s not interested, don’t pursue further
  • Don’t get angry if she rejects you
  • Don’t forget to ask for her number and to try and arrange meeting up in real life
  • Don’t send lots of messages if she doesn’t reply
  • neilw

    As always, very practical and helpful.

    Here’s hoping you haven’t opened too many floodgates (by the way, here’s a picture of my Dick)(He’s a budgie. Dick the budgie)(sometimes I smuggle him in my budgie smugglers)(Sorry. I’ll stop now)

  • Martin Phipps

    It works both ways. If you are female and pretty I will accept your friend request but if their first question on messenger is “Are you married?” I am going to ask them if they bothered to look at my profile,

  • Merry Christmas Mr Cricket

    The first thing I think of when a girl gives advice on “how to interact with women without being creepy” is that she needs to get over herself.

    • Ahaha, you should really check out or other places like that to see the full extent of how creepy men can be when interacting with women. It comes across not only as creepy, but also very disrespectful and every women has encountered at least one guy like that. For some people, even these simple tips aren’t obvious, and if it helps someone to interact with a girl better, then my job is done :)

      • Merry Christmas Mr Cricket

        The first thing I saw on that subreddit you linked was some dude just innocently striking up a conversation, and the woman goading him with insults and taunts. Yeah good example there, thanks for proving my point.

      • Merry Christmas Mr Cricket

        Look, your vagina is not the most precious thing in the world. Get over yourself.

        • I’m very happy that you don’t need the advice that is offered in this article. I’m simply trying to give an insight for men on how to approach women through social media without being considered “creepy” as many men do have this problem. This comes from my own personal experience and also those of many of my female friends. You’re free to ignore these articles and any advice I offer through them, and I wish you the very best :)

      • Merry Christmas Mr Cricket

        I just saw another post on there where the guy called a woman pretty.

        This is TERRIBLE.