When you’re in a relationship there are a few milestone events that you’ll eventually go through. The first kiss. First night staying over. However if you’re thinking “when should I introduce my girlfriend to my parents?” then it can be one of the harder and more nerve-wracking experiences.

Thanksgiving is only a day away and for many people it’s a time to see family for the first time in a while. Due to logistics, it’s sometimes really convenient to introduce your girlfriend to your parents at this time. However, this would be a bold move to make. Holidays are bad timing to introduce your girlfriend to your parents, and should be avoided.

Why is the holidays a bad time to introduce your gf? Because the holidays come with their own set of pressures and problems without introducing a newcomer to the mix. People get weird at holidays, there’s a lot of social expectations on what gets done, and there will also be a clash of traditions. On top of all that, bringing your girlfriend will put the focus on your girlfriend and yourself, which can take away from the holiday which some people may find selfish.

Are you ready to introduce your girlfriend to your parents?

The first thing you need to ask yourself is if you’re ready to introduce your girlfriend to your parents. At the end of the day, it’s the only question that really matters. Don’t make organise it if you feel pressured by either your parents or your girlfriend to do it. Instead make sure it’s something that you want to do.

Another thing to consider is how serious it can be taken. For some people, introducing new people to their parents is a normal and casual thing. However for most people, it’s a sign that the relationship is starting to get serious. If you’re dating a girl, but you don’t know if you’re ready for a serious committed relationship, it’s probably not the right time to introduce her to your parents. You’ll be giving her the wrong impression. If you really think it’s a good idea though, make sure you define your relationship to your girlfriend and also your parents before hand.

Tips to make it easier

When you decide that it’s the right time, there are some things you can do to make things go a little more smoothly.

  • Prepare your girlfriend and your parents –  By prepare them I mean there’s things you can tell them about in advance. Topics to avoid for instance, so you don’t get any uncomfortable topics being brought up. You should also tell your parents a bit about your girlfriend and vice versa so that they can have conversation starters to work with.
  • Warn your girlfriend about potential family drama – If your siblings have had a falling out, or if there’s a particularly eccentric aunt attending, it’s important to warn your girlfriend first. By knowing the potential drama that might happen, you’ll reduce the risk of embarrassment for all parties.
  • Tell your girlfriend about House Rules – You should tell your girlfriend about any house rules your family has. For instance, how do your parents feel about wearing shoes inside the house? What about showing physical displays of affection?
  • Tell your parents about her food allergies before hand
  • Praise your girlfriend – When you are with your parents, you want them to have a good first impression of your girlfriend. To do this, you need to tell them all the great things about her. She can’t tell them herself because it’ll come across as bragging. However you’re allowed to brag about your own girlfriend.

 

 

  • NeilW

    Why are you so much more sensible than I am? Yet more practical thoughts for relationships.

    • I think it’s easier when you sit down and think about it, especially if you’re not going through the pressures of the situations I write about! Most people will realise the same points I’ve given, but it’s easy to forget simple logic when you’re worried about these things :)

      • neilw

        Also I’m a shallow insensitive a-hole – that might have a bearing….

  • Nathan_Petrus

    I remember when I was younger, in all my 3 relationships my girlfriends were afraid to talk to the family they were dating.
    It was cool to meet their families and talk to their parents, in the end it was a silly fear and we always got along.
    Today I do not care much to date, I prefer open and short relationships.
    But it’s good to remember these things, congratulations for the great work @harrietsugarcookie-c81e728d9d4c2f636f067f89cc14862c:disqus